Very strange as it may sound but this is what all I have as the memory of my father.
There I was standing in a railway station (do not remember which one) and as the train approaches he covers my ears with his fingers as he may have been afraid of me getting scared of the sound the train engine produced or maybe he was concerned that the little ears of mine would not bear the sound. He passed away when I was 5. I don’t remember his face and I can’t recollect him whenever I want, as I never remember seeing him. So whenever a train passes by or I hear the sound of the train all I remember is my father, the man I never met and who had a role to bring me to this wonderful planet of earth.
It's still strange years later not having a reason to truly celebrate this dad’s day like before. I hear commercials for Father's Day sales, sweepstakes to win a holiday in a place of your choice for you and your dad, and even have the ability to spend anything to get him right from Dad coffee mug/tumbler from a department store to whatever he liked.
While passing by streets, there was this really funny card I wanted to get him. Then, after a few moments, I realized it didn't really matter. My father had passed away years before. Tears rolled on as I walked past the card shop. “Dad where are you…. I can’t say “Happy Father’s Day, Dad.”
My Mother told me, like so many, I had a dad who did a lot of things for me growing up. It seems he suffered through all the rough rides when he taught me to ride a tricycle; kept his toes out of the way when I learned to ride that and got me involved in loving animals, music and reading (he used to explain me from books I believe about different places) and my mother also told me how I used to nag him to learn and know things and he patiently used to explain. He was a good dad to me I was told. Later as I grew up I heard from his friends how nice as a human being he was and they wanted me to be admired like him and to grow up protecting his name.
Though I never had the opportunity to grow with dad and be with him, I learnt the value of a dad as I grew up as I missed him in every phase of my life. I missed my dad during my college days to tell him stories; I missed him all through my life.
But many people I've known have not had the greatest relationships with their fathers. For one reason or another, they were far from adequate, let alone perfect. These men were popular, had a lot of friends, but just didn't live up to the expectations that come with the title of dad. And equally the sons never lived upto the expectations of Dad.
While there are perhaps other duties that come with the job, this is a brief list I think I would have got if I had my father.
A father...
...I would have looked up to, and not just because he is taller.
...Understands that sometimes, his children are smarter than he is.
...Takes the family out often, even to places he may not care for.
...Teaches right from wrong, well from bad, neutral from extremes.
...Advises on things such as money, jobs and proper life.
...Sings Happy Birthday and helps blow out the candles if needed.
And, as learning to ride a bike shows...
...A father is there, pushing his kids forward, but knows when to let go and let them take control for themselves.
I know I shouldn't waste the time or money to get my father something since he is gone.
But I can't help thinking that whatever it was he taught me during the short time he lived with me is still with me today, including that strange sense of humor I picked up from him somehow. And the people who have seen him say that I resemble him as I grow. And I feel a sense of pride. Even if I don’t remember seeing my dad, I look like him.
So, perhaps I should still pick up some Old Spice (which he used) and baccardy rum for him, just to bring back the memory of this day as well as remember what being a father is about. On second thought, since I've never really forgotten, maybe that isn't necessary.
Well, a small bottle wouldn't hurt, just to help me feel the part.
Happy Father's Day!!! I miss you Dad.